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Thread: Programmer jokes

  
  1. #11
    Babkock's Avatar
    Babkock is offline Programmer -Hacks Member
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    How do you know when a programmer has had sex? (sorry if this is inappropriate)
    Spoiler:
    When he's washing pepperspray out of his eyes.


    Spoiler:
    There's 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who know binary, and those who don't.


    Nice jokes, everyone else

    My homebrew: ToneMatrix

  2. #12
    J697 is offline Programmer -Hacks Enthusiast
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    haha, I know there are more than that.


    .:#*BUMP*#:.

  3. #13
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    fragon is offline -Hacks Neophyte
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    -_-

  4. #14
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    RNB_PSP is offline -Hacks Smarty
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    lol at psp2 joke.

  5. #15
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    Stinkee2 is offline Programmer -Hacks Hacker
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    I took this screenshot a LONG time ago, and I don't know why I didn't think to post it here until now. But anyway, here you go LOL.



    It was for a "bad word" generator inspired by a book I got at a Spencer's
    Oh my and it was fantastic.
    "PM Oyabun a bunch of gay pr0n and you're in." - ...BeAkEr... (BeAkErOo)

  6. #16
    J697 is offline Programmer -Hacks Enthusiast
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stinkee2 View Post
    I took this screenshot a LONG time ago, and I don't know why I didn't think to post it here until now. But anyway, here you go LOL.



    It was for a "bad word" generator inspired by a book I got at a Spencer's
    Oh my and it was fantastic.

  7. #17
    NIGathan is offline Programmer -Hacks Hacker
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    Here are some quotes taken from the many variations of "shit happens"

    Programmer:
    It's shit, but at least it compiles.

    Developer:
    Shit happens on a daily basis, that's why we have maintenance programmers.

    Computer Science:
    There's a bug somewhere in this shittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

    Database:
    Where did I put that shit?

    Compiler:
    I don't care if it's shit, as long as it has semicolons in the right places.

    First-law-of-robotics-ism:
    Robots can not shit or let shit come to happen.

    AI:
    ...wanna bet?

    alt.cascade:
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>s
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>h
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>i
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>t
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>h
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>a
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>p
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>p
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>e
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>n
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>s

    rec.humor:
    Can someone send me some shit? I lost mine.
    Me too! I want shit too!

    alt.flame:
    Emacs is such shit! I save .00001% keystrokes with vi!

    UNIX:
    Bowel fault. Shit dumped.

    VAX/VMS:
    No Privilege for attempted shit.

    DOS:
    It's shit, but it's compatible.

    Windows:
    The same shit as DOS, only GUIer.

    X/Motif:
    That's another client's shit.

    PDP-11:
    It used to be good shit...

    Cray:
    If this code weren't such a piece of shit, they wouldn't need a supercomputer...

    Macintosh:
    ('nuff said)

    Pascal:
    Hey! That shit's the wrong type!

    C:
    It's shit, but it's efficient.

    C++:
    It's shit that's in a class by itself.

    Assembler:
    0x000000: 53 68 69 74 20 48 61 70 70 65 6E 73 21

    Ada:
    It's a package of shit, and it's private shit.

    Lisp:
    (defun Does_Shit_Happen(exp)(cond(t t)))

    Fortran:
    It's shit, but I don't know any better.

    Cobol:
    IT-IS-DEFINITELY-OLD-SHIT, BUT-IT'S-JOB-SECURITY.

    BASIC:
    It's shit.
    I may have forgotten a few related ones... Oh well.
    Last edited by NIGathan; 01-18-2011 at 04:21 PM.

  8. #18
    J697 is offline Programmer -Hacks Enthusiast
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    That's a lot of shit...

  9. #19
    Fd! is offline Banned -Hacks Titan
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    not sure if it belongs... but I'm getting this printed on a shirt:


  10. #20
    Mister Eff is offline Gone fishin -Hacks God
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fd! View Post
    not sure if it belongs... but I'm getting this printed on a shirt:

    I lol'd


    Might as well contribute:

    Last edited by Mister Eff; 01-18-2011 at 08:41 PM.

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